Last week I got a call that my best friend of 6 years died in a car accident. I was okay at first. Flew out to the funeral.
I'm so confused. I took a bunch of her stuff home and have just wanted to stay home and be with her things. I feel like a creep.
She had some mental issues. Her most recent nutso fling contacted me and told me that she was suicidal and I can't help but wonder if she wanted to die. That is really messing with me.I feel like such a terrible person for being so distant. I moved away for school and flew back on all my vacations. I haven't created a community in my new place.
I am having a really hard time. I feel this urge to do something. To live like she did and not go back to the way I was before. She was so friendly and warm, carefree and physically healthy. She was fun to talk to and did not give a shit about others opinions of her. I am afraid if I don't do something, the world will go on and she will be forgotten forever.
TL;DR My friend died in car accident. I want to know how to make a life change in a way that honors her life and the effect it had on me.
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