I (21/f) am waiting for my “perfect for me” partner...mom (47/f) thinks I’m fussy and will be forever single

Hi guys! To start, I want to emphasize that my mom and my family in general are good people with good intentions. I come from an area and a family with a history of young marriage.

Anyhow, I am 21/f. I live on my own with my dog and two cats, I work full time and I’m studying for my nursing degree. I don’t have a TON of friends, about four good ones. I’m working on becoming more fit, developing my passions, and overall enjoying my life. I am also one of those people who believe in a true love, and I want to meet someone who is genuinely good. I don’t have unrealistic expectations, I just want the person I spend my life with to be kind, worthy of trust and to have similar interests to mine. I recognize no one is actually perfect, but I believe everyone is perfect to SOMEONE. Needless to say, I’m young and willing to wait for that person. I was in a serious relationship from 19-freshly 21 that took a toll on my mental health but also made me realize my self-worth in a huge way. It also showed me my standards for long term relationships. At this very moment, I’m a bit over weight and don’t think I’m my best self, therefore I’ve taken a bit of a break from dating anyway. When I was really out there trying, it wasn’t working and I think maybe there’s a reason for that 🤷🏻‍♀️ no biggie.

Now onto the issue, my mom tries to set me up WITH everyone. If I say I’m not attracted/not interested, I’m too fussy. She thinks I want someone incredibly attractive, and that’s why I turn people down. That’s not the case at all, I just don’t want to waste time dating someone when A) I’m not in a state for serious dating and B) I don’t see long term compatibility. She’s made comments about me being lonely and being a spinster with my animals. I do love animals, but I’m only 21 and I don’t hoard them!

My older sister (24) is in a serious relationship and pretty much always has been in one from high school. We’re compared often, and it’s clear that my mom thinks a bit more of her for it. That hurts my feelings a bit. In general, I don’t know how to explain the above to my and have her understand that eventually I’ll meet someone and they will be great...I’m just not necessarily in a rush and I want it to be right anyway. Any tips? Am I unrealistic in wanting a partner who is ideal in my sense and not settling ?

Tl;dr- mom gives me shit for not dating just anyone, don’t know how to get her to back off

submitted by /u/jb014
[link] [comments]

from Relationships https://ift.tt/2GlyV3H