I moved to the UK from the US in September of last year for my postgraduate degree. Since then, I have been really loving it here, have got a wonderful boyfriend [26], and now am starting to look for a job. Ideally I am looking for a job where I am currently, because I love the city and would like to be with my boyfriend.
However, lately my parents have been talking so much about how they want me to come home, and find a job back home, and in particular are worried about my boyfriend, and that I will want to stay here permanently. It has been causing me tremendous guilt and pain because I love my parents and we’ve always had a pretty good relationship.
I really want to stay in the UK, at least for now. I don’t know where I will be in the future, or where life will take me, I am open to anything and haven’t set anything in stone.
My parents both know that I want to stay here longer, and I know that it is hard for them as they have expressed this, and I have spent countless hours crying because of the guilt I feel for leaving.
While I understand their feelings, I don’t think it is fair for them to put this all on me, especially since when they got married (at 21, and I’m 25), they moved across the country (6+ hours) away from their families as well, and where I am is about 9 hours by flight, which is not unreasonable.
I don’t what I am really looking for here, maybe some ideas on how to deal with the guilt, or how I can possibly have a conversation with my parents about this. To be clear, they are not forcing me to do anything, and I am completely independent and pay for everything on my own already. I just don’t how I can make my parents happy, all I know is right now it would make me so unhappy to go back home. I just hate for them to be upset.
TL;DR parents want me to move back to my home country after graduating, and I’m feeling tremendous guilt/pressure, and it’s really upsetting as I do not want to move back (for now anyways). But I don’t want my parents upset. How can I go about dealing with this?
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