7 Things to Know Before Dating a Startup Owner

Startup owners are fascinating people who excel at business, but unfortunately, they usually don’t excel that much when it comes to relationships.

The reason for that lies in their busy working schedule, excessive ambition, and work-life imbalance. They can be great and committed partners, but as you can see they come with their startup baggage.

If you’re dating a startup owner or considering it, you should prepare yourself for a rollercoaster of emotions, adventures and be ready to discover a whole new world.

Are you ready?

If so, then it would be wise to learn some positive and negative aspects of dating a startup owner and get a grasp of what you’re getting yourself into:

1. Startup owners don’t work from 9 to 5

Business owners juggle different roles on a daily basis – they are a CEO, marketing manager, client relationship manager, finance expert and so on. That’s why they always have their work on their mind, and rarely they can finish everything until 5 o’clock.

They’ll probably continue to work when they get back home, and laptop will be their best friend, or they’ll wake up at 6 A.M. to work on new sales strategies.

2. Startup owners have small budgets

When entrepreneurs start their own business, they put all their resources into it, their expertise, time, effort and of course finances.

In the beginning, it’s usually hard to have a steady income.

There are many things startup owners need to take care of first before they get their paycheck. It will take some time until they get on their feet and achieve financial stability.

3. Startup owners don’t like procrastinators

Startup owners are competent individuals who are motivated and inspired.

Therefore, they like to surround themselves with the same type of people. They don’t like spending time with procrastinators and lazy people without ideas.

You should definitely do some soul-searching to figure out what exactly makes you always put things off and wait until the last minute.

You can also find an exciting hobby or take a course to learn a new skill.

4. Spontaneity is another name for startup owners

Since they have a flexible working schedule and a proactive attitude, you’ll never have a boring moment with a startup owner.

They are full of surprises that go beyond roses and chocolate.

When they have an idea, they immediately act and go for it. You just need to say yes and enjoy the ride on this exciting rollercoaster.

5. Frequent last-minute changes

Startup owners have a busy working schedule that needs to be flexible whenever new opportunity, project or meeting arise. Therefore, it isn’t unusual to have your plans canceled and postpone your weekend getaway, date night or hanging out with your friends.

The key to making it work is to be flexible as well and seize every moment you have together.

6. Startup owners ask a lot of questions

Having a curious and analytical mind, entrepreneurs tend to question everything and ask many questions, even if the subject isn’t related to their business. They like to gain new knowledge.

Learning is a never-ending process for them.

Probably you’ll get used to it, so you will end up asking questions yourself and learning new things.

7. You’ll watch TV shows like Silicon Valley

Startup owners like to watch entrepreneurial films or TV shows because they inspire them to work harder and to aim for higher goals. It’s another way to learn about their hectic business culture.

So, don’t be surprised when your partner asks you to watch The social network or The Pursuit of Happiness.

Who knows, maybe you’ll like it and learn something new?

Wrapping up

Every relationship has its ups and downs.

There is no secret formula to a successful relationship with a startup owner, or in fact, with anybody else.

However, being familiar with the obstacles that may arise along the way can significantly increase chances for a happy relationship with a startup owner.

As in any relationship, it’s crucial to keep open and frequent communication to avoid possible difficulties and together with love and trust.

This will be an excellent foundation for a successful relationship.

In the end, keep in mind that startup owners can make the best or worst relationship material depending on their partner.

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Change Your Relationship with These 8 Tips

Change Your Relationship with These 8 Tips appeared first on Relationships Reality and was authored by Sarah Adelle and Sophia Elise

Do you want to change your relationship? Improving your romantic life may be something you want to happen, but how are you making it happen? It could be that you have settled into a rut, or perhaps even hope things will change on their own. If you really want to change in your relationship for the better, here are a few tips that you could easily implement now to start turning things around. If both you and the one you love commit to making positive changes, you should see results in no time.

1. Stop criticizing. Let go of feeling the urge to voice your negative opinions to the one you love. Take a sabbatical from it for a while. Was your criticizing really changing things anyway? Was it helping the situation? After a while, when someone constantly hears criticism they tend to shut down and turn off. Which leads us to..

2. Compliment the one you love more. You don’t have to overdo it. Make a note to find at least one thing you can compliment then about daily. Bringing positivity into a relationship can help immensely. It can also help diffuse building tensions, change attitudes, and break down resentments.

3. Say please and thank you. If you have manners you say “please” when asking a stranger to do something for you. You also say thank you when a stranger is kind to you. (If you don’t, you need to) So why shouldn’t you say please and thank you to the one you love? Because you feel entitled to order the one you love around? Do you take for granted they should just do things for you or help you? If you do, you need an attitude adjustment. Perhaps if you both do this, you will forcibly remind yourselves just how much you both actually do for one another.

Change Your Relationship with These 8 Tips

4. If there are people interfering in your relationship or taking away from your relationship then it is time to reprioritize. That is great that you have been helping your brother out but if it is taking too much time away from your relationship you have to stop giving so much and put it back into your relationship. If your friends or family have come between you and your relationship, or are putting you in the middle, bow out for a while. Stay away from them and regroup with the one you love. Build back up the strength in your relationship that has taken a hit due to outside influences.

5. Turn off electronic devices when walking in the door or when the one you love walks in the door. Regardless of what either of you are doing it can wait until you give each other a hug, kiss, or a hello. Take a few minutes to talk before resuming something important. And just so you know, playing games or browsing social media for amusement are not important. When eating meals together, all devices should be off. Period. yes, there may be some situations that require to do, but on most occasions, you can turn the things off.

6. Set a new goal to improve yourself. Empowering yourself will make you feel more confident, positive, and more proud of yourself. By doing that for yourself, you bring this same energy into your relationship. You may even inspire the one you love to improve themselves as well, even in the same way.

7. Look into a new activity you both could enjoy. It doesn’t have to be expensive or time-consuming. You could both take a cooking class, painting class, you name it. Check Groupon and other apps for ideas and to save money. It helps breathe new life into your social lives together and invites you both to try new things. If there have been things you have wanted to do but haven’t found the time, it is time to stop putting it off.

8. Treat yourselves to something at least once a week. You could run out on a Saturday and get ice cream together just for the hell of it. You could bring the one you love their favorite candy bar, flowers, or a magazine from the store you are shopping at. You don’t have to wait for a special occasion to do something special. You also do not have to spend a lot of money for a kind simple gesture to mean a lot.

Any other tips or suggestions to change your relationship for the better? Feel free to leave them in the comments below! With new year’s just around the corner, resolving to change your relationship will make your life happier.

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Insights on Same-Sex Marriage from Julie Gottman

Julie Gottman performed the world’s first controlled study on children being raised in the homes of lesbian moms.

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What Men Really Want in a Love Relationship

Do you ever wonder what the heck is going on with men and relationships? Tired of all their confusing signals? One minute they want you, the next they seem ambivalent and distant. And, we’re supposed to be mysterious! Through my work as a therapist and clinical supervisor of other individual, couple, and family therapists, I’ve [...]

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Few Things to Remember While Working on Your Marriage

The Talmud suggests that an early marriage, surely one supported by the parents and family, can help bring about a successful marriage.

Two types of parents in the Orthodox world

There are those who raise their children to prepare for this world and the next by studying the Torah and also prepare their children to earn a living.

These children come to maturity faithful to the dictates of their parents.

When it comes time to marry, the parents or family make suggestions, or sometimes a stranger makes a good suggestion, and if the family and the boy or girl are interested, it could be a marriage.

We call this the first type of parent or child because the parents guide the steps of the child towards marriage and further.

Another type of family is when the child grows up independently, finds his or her own friends, and decides on their own how to earn a living. Sometimes a parent is unable to guide the child, or dies, or is in a family where the spouses’ quarrel or divorce.

Surely in such situations, a child is often on his own.

A child of a problem family has a problem escaping problems.

So let us first concentrate on the first level, where a child is given a good start at finding the right way to marry. What is involved?

Rabbis taught children to marry young

One thing the rabbis taught is that we want children to marry young. This means marrying at the age of eighteen or maybe seventeen unless the boy is involved heavily in learning Torah and needs some more time.

Furthermore, if a boy is actively seeking a wife, but has not found the right one, this may be acceptable, at least, for a few years. There is, in addition, another idea, one so powerful it may even influence a child from the second level of seeking success in marriage, where the family is broken or divided or somewhat lacking what a child needs from his parents.

That is the passage in the Torah, “and he should make his wife happy.” Rashi and the Zohar tell us that this mitzvah is not a command for the wife and husband to treat each other properly.

It is a mitzvah only upon the husband, that the burden of making his wife rejoice is not upon her, but only upon the husband.

Monetary obligations create marital problems

Raishis Chochmo explains that this can refer to monetary obligations that the husband has. If it is freezing outside and the husband only has money to buy one winter coat, he can buy it, but it should be for the wife.

Obviously, when there is only one coat in the house, and this means that one person cannot go outside in the cold, we have problems. A great rabbi once had this problem, and he took turns with his wife who would use the coat. But the basic idea is that the wife should, if possible, have her coat.

But, maybe the husband can find some job to support the needs of the family so that both husband and wife don’t freeze in the winter.

Differences between parents and children

The mitzvah of “and he should make his wife happy” can apply even to the first level when parents do their part in making children happy and successful.

People are what they are, and children being what they are.

Differences can sprout up, not only between couples, but between children and parents, and sometimes these differences lead to, in any kind of marriage, to anger and even divorce.

We have covered a lot of material in our short pages here, so let us pause a bit, and devote some space to divorce. This is important because divorce does happen and when it does many people simply refuse to remarry.

This itself is a major disaster, and it consumes a large section of the community, even the Orthodox community.

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Divorce – Why It Occurs and What Is Next?

Why does divorce occur?

People don’t get along for many reasons that often brings about divorce. Therefore, we must turn to the next question in our title – What is Next?

Divorce is a tragedy, but it is one that can be repaired.

A person can remarry. But, the tragedy today is that people who divorce often refuse to remarry. Not only do they refuse to remarry, but they shack up illicitly with others who often have no intent to remarry.

Everyone is desperate to get everyone remarried

People are desperate to get people married and produce expensive programs to get people to come down and meet somebody that they may marry.

They meet, they talk, they go for a walk, a drive, or even go to a nice restaurant, maybe a nice movie, and rarely do they remarry.

A rabbi who is heavily involved in these issues told me that even Orthodox Jews who were divorced are not easily enticed into remarrying, and they, sadly, end up sinning, HaShem Yerachem.
 
Let us talk about this a bit.

Lack of marital relation can be the reason for marital separation

A person marries, it doesn’t work out, and perhaps, husband and wife have no marital relations. Such a thing is possible and is even discussed in religious books on marriage.

One serious book suggests that if a woman lives in the house with her married husband, but loses interest in having marital relations with him, and she stays in the house tending the children and working in the house in general, despite her refusal to have marital relations, this is something that requires the rabbis in the community to understand.

What is happening? Why has the wife acted this way? Is the husband behaving properly? What went wrong?

The key element behind the wife’s refusal of marital relations

Does the wife refuse marital relations because she demands a divorce, that is, she wants to be free of the husband entirely, and perhaps to remarry? Or does she not want to leave the house, but will continue to live there, along with the husband in the same abode, but refuses to have relations with him.

Get answers from another teaching in the Gemora

It seems that at a time a woman who demanded a divorce from her husband and states a reason why she wants the divorce, was generally believed.

In those very early years, women were known to be honest and not lie about their husbands.

But as time went on, the rabbis noted that some women were lying about their husbands simply because they preferred a different person to be their husband.

The stories about her present husband were quite possibly not true, then the rabbis ruled that women could not force the husband to give them a divorce.

Shamming the husband without demanding a divorce

What if she does not demand a divorce, and does not mention the words “I want a divorce,” but can say what she wants about the husband regarding her refusal to have marital relations with him?

In such a case, it is highly possible that the next step is for senior rabbis to talk to the husband.

Is he treating his wife right, or not?

The rabbis give the husband a certain amount of time to straighten things out in the house with his wife. If it works, fine, marriage is back in style in that house.

The alternate solution

But if it doesn’t work, and the wife has not demanded a GET, then the rabbis may decide to force the husband to give a GET.

Now, the fact that a woman does ask for a GET means we don’t force the husband.

We don’t trust the woman because maybe she asks for a GET not because her complaints are true, but because she would prefer a different man for her husband.

But if the rabbis can ascertain on their own that the husband has done things to cause grief to the woman in a manner that can bring about a forced GET, so that the woman is not the one who talks bad things about the husband but the rabbis independently realize this, that may result in a forced GET.

Such is mentioned in the Shulchan Aruch when the rabbis sense that a man has taken a job that requires him to acquire a terrible smell that no woman can tolerate, he may, possibly, be forced to divorce his wife.

Torah’s commandment

The Torah commands a man to marry and to have children, a boy, and a girl. Ideally, he should continue to have more children.

There was a case where a man had many boys and no girls.

A rabbi suggested that he divorce his wife because he was unable to fulfil the command to have a son and a daughter. But the senior rabbi of the time, Rav Yosef Shalom Elyashev, cautioned prudence.

No divorcing. 

Indeed, some say that women are not superior to men and two men may equal a man and a woman.

It is true that the Talmud says that HaShem respects women more than men and trusts them perhaps more than men, but when it comes to forcing a man to divorce his wife for having two boys and no girls, that is off track.

But, when a couple simply refuses to have marital relations, and have not had even the basic two children, this is serious. Do the rabbis intervene and force a divorce? Do they force intimacy?

These are separate issues, but very relevant to the people involved.

In other words, when marriage doesn’t work, and people do not divorce, we have serious problems, maybe problems that have no workable solution.

And what of the people who don’t have relations but don’t divorce? Do we threaten them?

I don’t present here solutions to these terrible problems, which do happen, only to say that these are the kind of things that can occur in a marriage, and they do.

What we can try to do is to find a way to solve the problems, hopefully, with no divorce, but if no solution appears, what else can be done?

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One of the Tricks to Loving Through Differences…

One of our favorite songs is a song by the band U2 called “One.” In the song there’s a line that we just love that says this… “We’re all one but were not the same.” When it comes to our relationships, this is sometimes magnified …

One of the Tricks to Loving Through Differences… Read More »

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