We’ve been together for over 5 years and this has always been an issue but I feel it’s getting worse. I can tell it’s truly affected him terribly his entire life and was very sympathetic in the beginning because I also had some body issues my entire life.
I don’t have much of a sexual past so there’s no issue there, but I do work a medical job and he has a huge problem with that as I frequently see people (men) naked. I’ve tried to explain to him over and over how different things are when you’re in healthcare and have to see everything. Nothing is from a sexual standpoint nor do we discuss/compare size. He refuses to understand this and thinks I’m lying and that any person would look at another penis and instantly compare it to their partners.
I’m also a very non-visual person (like a lot of women), I don’t really get turned on just by the sight of a male body. He’s the opposite (like most men) and is extremely/obsessively visual. He also doesn’t fully believe me when I tell him I’m not visual. I’ve never betrayed his trust, we have a healthy sex life, and I’ve never said anything about his size other than positive things that I 100% stand by.
I’ve reached a point where I’m so sick of hearing about it that I don’t know what to do or if it’s fixable. We argue about it almost weekly and it’s the same thing every time. I got a degree to do what I do and most people really respect my job. I flat out said I will not be changing my career and although I’m empathetic, enough is enough. I believe there is nothing I can do to ease his mind so I stopped trying.
He recognizes that he has a huge issue with this and it gets in the way of normal daily life. There are even way more issues that I won’t list here because it would take forever. But he refuses to do anything about it even though it’s starting to take over our relationship. He says “what is there to do? Nothing”. I personally don’t know what besides counseling which he seems pretty closed off to. I would love to hear if anyone has experienced something similar or if there are men out there who feel the same.
I’d also like to state that he has a pretty averagely sized penis which is why this also pisses me off because I’m VERY content with it and I kind of feel like that’s all that should matter...but I guess it doesn’t work that way.
TL;DR- fiancé is insecure about this size of his (average) penis and let’s those insecurities take over. We constantly argue because I work in a medical job and see men naked and he feels I spend my time comparing sizes. Not sure what to do to help him and reaching the end of my rope.
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from Relationships https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/8lhbw4/my_22f_fiancé_21m_has_serious_self_esteem_issues/
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