I've known this girl for almost 10 years, we met in college. I cut contact just 2 years after we first met because I was interested in her but I never thought she'd be. At the time I was shy, quiet, and stupid kid so I never really explained to her why. I never forgot about her and all of a sudden, she texted me a year ago (about 8 years later) and want to hang out.
We've talked frequently for almost a year mainly catching up but never met because of busy schedule. Finally, we came down to it and I admit why I left and I confessed. I learned that those years ago she thought I left because I didn't like her. I explained myself more and when it came down to it she sees me as a brother. She also isn't looking to date now and wants to focus in school. She's in the mindset that if someone comes by he comes by and she's not in any rush and school is important because she wants to finish her degree. She says she see me as a good friend and care because I help her with school/job. She’s sad to see me go but at the same time understand if I decide to and don’t want to cause any issues with me always thinking about her.
Part of me say to leave, you'll be sad but when you find a girl you'll forget all about this and move on.
Another part of me wants to maybe lie? and say, stay as friend and hang out. There might be a chance since she's not really looking. Just be your usual self that she's cool with and maybe one day something might happen. She's also up to trying to help you find a girl so maybe. Plus you could always be trying to date a girl while you're hanging out with her.....but will I really be able to? since you are probably subconsciously still trying to get with her.
The biggest thing for me right now is, my mind's driving me crazy because I think about her constantly and it takes a lot of energy and I feel really relieved when I'm able to think about another subject, focus about something and forget about her. Talking to her does relieved a lot of things though.
TLDR; I want to date an old friend who see me as a brother and isn’t looking to date right now. She wants to hang out but understand if I feel like I need to leave. Part of me say to leave and move on while another part say stay see how it goes and you can try to date other girls while you hang out.
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