Link to previous post: Right here.(https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/8idr05/my_31f_partner_33m_of_2_years_and_his_ex_not_sure/?utm_content=title&utm_medium=user&utm_source=reddit&utm_name=frontpage)
So.... you were all right.
It's been a shitty ride. I had him over that night to discuss things.
There's a lot more to it.
We were getting a place together. He moved in and I was due to move in in a month. We were sort of going through a rough patch and trying to work it out. For whatever reason it was like a light switch in his head where he started pushing me away. Then blaming me for distance in our relationship.
We had a lot of talks during that time. Including a two hour conversation 3 days before he kissed his ex, where we discussed how we want this and how to move forward in our relationship, and I left him room to work things out in his head for 2 weeks.
I guess.... I probably should have broken up with him on the spot when I had him over to discuss all this. But I thought we could work through it. He was swearing he loved me, he wanted this. All that.
3 days later he was back to, "I don't know what I want." So I issued an ultimatum that we can work on it right here and now, go to therapy, if he could just show me any way that he was committed to this.
He didn't. I walked. I had to, really.
A large chunk of my heart died inside over all this. I've lost a lot of my friends, because I don't want to slander his name and tell everyone what happened. I'm not invited to a memorial day bbq over it. I'm left scrambling to find a place to live. It's just all a really really shit situation.
He reached out over the weekend, telling me he wanted to keep in contact and see where things go. But I think it's best to just cut the cord in full.
He was my best friend. And I have no idea why he changed so quickly, when he had been asking me to live with him for months prior. It was like, "please move in with me." and telling me he was only doing it for me (I never asked for it) to 2 months later kissing his ex in public.
I've called a lot of therapists.
I'm not really okay though. My last boyfriend before this was very emotionally abusive. I thought I was past it (it had been six years between him and this one), but this brought up a lot of the same feelings. My self confidence is less than zero right now.
I think I took a lot of my own self respect for myself away in all this.... and I hate it.
tl/dr: we broke up. I need therapy.
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